The Pathway

10/26/22

I said in my previous post, “The Voice from Eternity came to me recently in the early morning hours; the appeal came in the form of a dream.  Once I awoke from the dream to a scripture, I knew what the Lord wanted.  I was taken back but my heart knew He was right.  God called and needed me to take care of something.”  That something was forgiveness of former church leaders/pastors.

If you haven’t read my book, I was involved in a ten-year intercession job for the Lord which involved the leaders/pastors of my former church.  More specifically, the head pastor. 

I struggled with anger and the need to forgive how the head pastor (and leaders under him) treated me.  I never meant this brother any harm.  At the time when I initially forgave him, I was reading Freedom from Fear by Neil Anderson.  On page 316: “Forgiveness is agreeing to live with the consequences of another person’s sin.  No one truly forgives without accepting and suffering pain of another person’s sin.”

But I thought I had forgiven him and them, though my unforgiveness resurfaced in 2022 prior to the head pastor’s death.  The story is told here: A Body of Evidence, A Body as Evidence.

I found it hard to be asked by God to forgive something that God had revealed to me and asked me to take care of for Him.  It was the Lord who started this whole thing, and I was left holding onto the emotional baggage. 

And yet, when I look at the scripture, He gave 2 Corinthians 2:10: Now, whom you forgive anything I also forgive for if indeed I have forgiven anything, I have forgiven that one for your sake’s in the presence of Christ. I put God in the verse and me in the verse and then it made sense. The Lord has to see my sin and forgive me, just as I had to see their sin and forgive them!  And this speaks to the fact that we are to become more like Him.

The statement: “Forgive those whom the LION walks among!” was telling.  To me, it spoke of forgiving the brethren in all forms.  You see, not only did my unforgiveness resurface for the leaders and pastors of my former church but it had morphed into a condescension for other mega-churches.  I felt uneasy about how they operate; what they preach; just an overall dislike.  This emotion would come out when I would listen to them online, there was no denying I had a dislike for them in my heart.  I did not feel that way for small churches, but I noticed I was suspicious of church leadership, no matter what the size. 

So, how do I forgive such a phantom thing?  The Pathway came in the form of a book and a song.  The book The Forgiveness Project.  I will use this book as our guide through this process.

“After thorough medical, theological, and sociological research and clinical experience at Cancer Treatment Centers of America (CTCA), author and pastor Michael Barry has made a startling discovery: the immune system and forgiveness are very much connected… With each true account comes proven strategies, tested and used by CTCA, that readers can implement to find peace with their past, relief from their hatefulness, and hope for healing.”

And the song I was given: “Put Your Hand in The Hand” by Donny Hathaway.  Here are the lyrics:

The pathway had been laid out, now I needed to do some homework.  I read the book and made a list of all I felt led to forgive.  That was my starting point.  I hope you endure with me down this pathway.