A Difficult Calling Announced

As I said in my post “The Lady in Red”, answering God’s call into ministry is thrilling, if not scary.  When I first was told by the Lord what my gift was, I was happy and very excited.  Time progressed and I grew in the gift of prophecy with a chaser of the Fruit of the Spirit!  After a couple of years, the Lord started preparing me for a future calling that would challenge me like nothing else in my life.  A difficult calling was being announced.

I suppose I am in good company, as God has told others of their life’s mission for the gospel.  I think of Saul turned Apostle Paul who was told he would suffer many things (not that I compare myself to Paul).  Even through another (Ananias), Paul received confirmation in Acts 9:15-16: But the Lord said to him, “Go, for he is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel. For I will show him how many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.”

“When God called Paul from being the church’s persecutor to be a gospel preacher, the Lord showed him how much he would suffer for the sake of His name (see Acts 9:10–16).” What the Apostle Paul Teaches Us about Suffering | Crossway Articles

Though our biblical heroes serve as Godly examples to us, it is hard to accept the reality of a difficult calling.  I guess the Lord obscures our understanding as to not scare us off!  I was told of this hard ministry early on by the Lord and had it confirmed by others, but I had no real template for the future.

From my journal circa 1999: “Child, count the cost…I train My prophets carefully and completely.  They are My servants and My training is perfect.  Remember, your call not only affects your life, but the lives of all who know you, those of your family, your friends, your fellow workers.  Count the cost, yes, but far better to be patient of My plan for you.  There is much training to be done.  And you are learning at the pace I set, I decide.   

Eye has not seen, nor ear heard…the things which God has prepared for those who love Him.  But God has revealed them to us through His Spirit. For the Spirit searches all things, yes, the deep things of God.  (1 Cor. 2:9-10).  

A few months later, the calling was further confirmed through my friend and mentor Cindy. 

“People will try to deter you off the path.  At the very end of the highway is Jesus, standing and waiting for you.  Your eyes are on Him; others won’t see, they will mock you.  There will be those who pull very hard, but God will be your strength and your shield.  He has been training you for this assignment and He will be with you every step of the way…pray first and without ceasing.  Prayer is the key.  Never fear.”

Isaiah 43:1-3 But now, thus says the Lord, who created you, O Jacob, and He who formed you, O Israel: ‘Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine.  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you.  When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you.  For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.

God’s warnings of training continued through prayer journaling’s over the years.  Then, another was brought to me for more confirmation.  An interesting thing happened in the reception area of a customer’s office.  As I waited, the receptionist gave me a word from the Lord.  She said, “I don’t usually say these kinds of things to a stranger, but God is going to elevate you; expect an elevation.  Many people will be influenced by you.  Wait for His elevation, it is coming.  Do not be afraid of the enemy, he cannot harm you; God is far greater than he.  Consider it done.” 

What?  I was floored by such a word from God by a stranger as that had never happened to me before.  I became friends with the receptionist, Gean, who turned out to be an evangelist and had a ministry of her own.  This elevation Gean spoke of came shortly thereafter, when the head pastor of my church asked me to pray for why the church and the women’s ministry were in disarray. 

Gean subsequently told me that I would take on people’s physical symptoms; and be a sign for God.  She also told me, “The Lord deals with you differently.  You have a very strange ministry, very hard, difficult.  It is an unusual ministry.”  That was a rather ominous word from God and time would test it out.

During the same time of tutelage, a Pastor (Vincent) gave me personal prophecies on being a Jeremiah-type prophet.  Now I would add, who in their right mind when living a nice comfortable life would want to have a Jeremiah calling announced?  Jeremiah was the weeping prophet, who was tortured emotionally and physically at times due to his ministry.  Thank You Lord, that his words took many years to play out.

Then a decade later, Jeremiah, himself, was sent to me.  In the dream I met Jeremiah the prophet from the Bible.  He was waiting for me and I was seated in front of him; he had a beard and was rather clean cut, despite what I would think the Old Testament prophet would look like.  We sat across from one another and he knew everything about me, and I didn’t have to say a word to him.  He already knew who I was and what I was thinking.

This is a pretty easy interpretation; my ministry is viewed in heaven like that of the weeping prophet.  The dream occurred after I retired from corporate America and as I started experiencing signs in my body as Gean prophesied.  However, with real physical symptoms, came real fear.  I took my concerns to a dear wise friend, Trudie.  

During lunch, I confessed what was happening in my body and how God kept telling me along with scripture addresses that it was Him.  Trudie listened wisely and a few days later, she responded after prayer. 

In her own words: “God has called you a prophet.  With that calling, He constrains you; hedges you in with affliction and His words, so you can do His will and hear Him.  Really listen to Him.  He will not let you move to the right or to the left for your calling will not allow that.  The verse I heard was ‘And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us’ is the example regarding your physical signs. From Webster: ‘To hold back by or as if by force or bonds to force by imposed restriction or limitation.’”

The next day, I was given the scripture address John 1:14 as confirmation of her words…God’s words!  The Lord used these words and that experience years later to recently comfort me.   I had been experiencing stabs in my side for months leading up to the head pastor’s (from the prayer assignment) death in January 2022.  I was fixated on understanding what was going on. 

So, with much consternation, I asked God what was happening (not remembering Trudie’s sage words from ten years earlier).  I awoke from a nap thinking: And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, John 1:14.  I looked up the verse and it was given to me on May 7, 2012, by Trudie.

I thought of Ezekiel (the sign of him on his side…me poked in the side) and I asked if I’m touched by God on my side to give me the address in scripture.  Believe it or not, the Lord gave me Ezekiel 4:8 and a date of May 2012 with Trudie’s name by it, again!  God confirmed all this poking and stabbing was from Him similar to His OT prophet.

And surely, I will restrain you so that you cannot turn from one side to another till you have ended the days of your siege.  Ezekiel 4:8.

The poking started in 2021, after the 10:10 Again dream which had to do with war and our military, bad stuff coming to the country.  Then, Afghanistan happened three months later, and the stabs cleared up.  Poking again January 2022, before the pastor’s death, then it cleared up. And again, stabs the day the Ukrainian war started!  See a pattern?  It’s like God is saying ‘WATCH’ which, of course, drives me into my prayer closet to find out what’s going on.

I called on the Lord in distress; The Lord answered me and set me in a broad place.  THE LORD IS ON MY SIDE; I will not fear. Psalm 118:5-6.

He has turned a SIDE my ways and torn me in pieces; He has made me desolate. Lamentations 3:11.               

The whole reason I mention this course of announcement and confirmation is so that those of you who receive a difficult calling as I have will know you are not alone.  There are times when I feel like God is not loving due to this work I have been assigned; yet my guiding light is and always has been His Word.  There I find those I commensurate with knowing that the Lord has told us we will suffer in one form or another for His name. 

For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps. 1 Peter 2:21.

Yet, with this suffering comes the thrill of His voice, the ecstasy of knowing that the kingdom of God is truly within me.  There are those who would say ‘God would not do that to believers today’.  My life and my story speak to God’s reality; For I AM THE LORD, I do not change.  Malachi 3:6.

I watched an interview with the actor Jon Voight, who had an encounter with God which left him in awe.  As he bewailed his situation about life being so hard, the Lord responded: “It’s supposed to be.”  Need I say more!